The Nevada Day Parade was very, well, Nevadan. If you were missing that guy in your town who walks around wearing red thermal underwear, suspenders, huge belly, a long white beard, a pick and a huge goofy hat- he was in Carson City with us.

I have many a tale to tell but right now I’m slaving away on an Econ paper that’s due at midnight tonight. Midnight on Halloween. Now that is scary, no?

One quick morsel tho. My favorite slice of irony from yesterday: When the float for Daddy Dick’s went by, with a guy performing Sweet Home Alabama… in the Nevada Day parade. Everyone was rocking out. People wonder how I stay so cynical.

BTW, if you are using a feedreader to view my blog, change the link.

I am going to get rid of the RSS 1.0 now. If you want to continue getting the feed use one of the XML links on my sidebar.

XML
ATOM

SheckyMagazine got an RSS feed! (now, I won’t mention the fact that they said they would email me to tell me about it and didn’t.)

Shecky is the product of comics Traci Skene & Brian McKim. Not only does it provide a venue for comedy writers to get exposure, it’s also a great look into the world of stand-up. Reading Shecky has taught me a lot obout what it is that I’m getting myself into.

Stop over and check it out. Also, if you want to add it to your feed reader, here’s the link to their ATOM feed.

It went swimmingly. Our pals the Lathers came, as well as one of my co-workers. Each set is feeling progressively better. This one marked my fifth ever- not counting the one in college I’ll tell you about some other time.

I felt more polished up there. Not to say that I wasn’t terrified. For some reason that came back and it won’t leave. One of the comics I really dig told me later, “If that feeling ever leaves- you’ll surely bomb. Johnny Carson did the Tonight Show for a zillion years and still got so nervous each time he almost threw up.”

I liked that. My set flowed well this time and the tempo seemed a smidge faster with the punch lines. The crowd was a little rough on the comics though. They’re usually young and ready to laugh- this crowd was more family style and Republican and cranky. They were willing to laugh, but you had to work for it.

I got to do this one about the Fat kids whose parents sued McDonalds- I’ve always wanted to do that one.

I feel really lucky that this is working out-It’s been a dream of mine for a long time. I wish I could put more time into it but it’ll have to wait till I’m done with my MBA. Well, I’ll post the video of the set when I get around to it & next week I’ll be at it again.

I’m going to be a marshal in the great Nevada Day parade this Saturday.

It’s the only parade I know of where the cub scouts and the shriners are followed up by the local whore house. I’m serious.

This should be interesting.

My office is kept at a constant 7 degrees below zero.

I just cracked a nipple.

So Google went and bought Keyhole, makers of aerial maps taken by satellite. “But why,” you ask. What would Google want with photos of every square inch of planet Earth? No fear, gentle readers, uncle Eddie has a few ideas that could blow this whole thing wiiiiiide open.

• The ultimate most sickest version of Mapquest EVER!!!!

• Search for someone, and they wave to you.
• They could do cool contests where people dress up their property to look like the google logo to win cash and prizes. OK that one sucked.
• Rooftop sunbathers. Nerds rejoice.
• Grand Theft Auto: Your Neighborhood. They could start using the photography to customize video games. Carjack your math teacher.
• One step closer to knowing everything you do. Always. They know what you search for, what’s on your desktop, who your friends are, what kind of email you get- and now, what you barbeque. Begin construction on your tinfoil hat, friend.

I guess it’s obvious I have no idea. Do me a favor and let’s hash this one out in the comments.

Here’s a new category at EADC, Site O The Day. Do yourself a favor and check these suckers out. They just might add a little purpose to your otherwise meaningless life.

First on the menu is Jake’s Comedy Corner. Hilarious hilarity. It’s written by Jake Novak- I’ll refrain from rewriting his bio and just give it to you off his site:

Jake Novak is a prolific comedy writer specializing in monologue “news jokes” and longer-form satirical pieces. His work is regularly published in Newsday and several web sites including WhiteHouse.org and Shoptalk. He also happens to be a producer at CNN.

It’s quite a find. Yesterday he managed to rip on Ashlee Simpson and Bush in the same joke- something coincidentally I also had in mind for this Thursday’s set at the Great Basin.

I dig his stuff because it’s intelligent and quick. Reading the blurb on the side panel I note that he’s also a Prof at NYU. I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen him on TV or not, but I’d like to see his live show.

Check it out. Laugh your coal-mining ass off. Thank me later.

Another reason I need a camera phone.

There’s someone on my floor who is an artist. He doesn’t work in a conventional medium, though- He’s a pioneer. He’s been assembling a work I will title, “The Booger Mosaic.”

Each time he uses the urinal, he puts a booger on the wall to the right of it. Big ones, too. The kind that line the whole side of your nostril, and usually have a gooey tail.

I’m not sure if he delicately places each one in a particular order, or if he just flicks them all willy nilly. His last work developed for quite a while before it was finally taken down by a custodian (obviously not an eye for art). But, sure as your morning dump he was at it again almost immediately. The man is dedicated.

If I had a camera equipped with a phone, rest assured gentle readers you would be looking at it right now. For now you’ll just have to use your imagination. Enjoy.

Do yourself a favor. Quit looking up naughty stuff on the internet, put some pants on and go buy Dane Cook: Harmful if Swallowed. If you love me you’ll do it.

Trust me. Pop the DVD in and after 15 minutes, you will experience a deeply satisfying feeling down in the cockles of your heart. Your cockles will thank you. Of all the comedy I’ve seen this year, Harmful if Swallowed was the most refreshing. After that, Chris Rock’s Never Scared was good and so was Dave Chappele’s 2000 release (his latest blows. hard.).

Dane Cook exemplifies the concept that if you can get the audience to like you- they’ll laugh at anything. He manages to be unconventional while avoiding being gimmicky. His style and his content are all over the map, ranting at times about average houseold stuff, then doing full-on Alien impressions. He’s also rather physical on stage.

I hadn’t seen much stand-up before starting it myself, and his act showed me I could be more myself on stage. There’s a reason he was just picked as RollingStone’s “Hot Comic.” Cook is seriously on the rise. He’s got another DVD/CD set coming out in January also.

So buy it. Then have your cockles email me and tell me how much they liked it.

I’ve been trying to solve this problem for a while now- must content expire? I think that we (bloggers) do ourselves a terrible disservice with the whole date-based archive deal, but there doesn’t seem to be a way around it yet.

My first problem: I want to attract an audience. So how do you do it? Good content. But there’s this temptation to hold onto your best stuff and wait for a bigger readership (don’t get all “I just blog for the fun of it.” there’s an attention whore in you, me and all the rest of the blogoshpere. deny that and we all know you’re a big fat liar). But does expiration even have to be an issue?

Once you have an audience, can you just pull that stuff off the shelf, dust it off and re-post it? I’m curious about the reception that would receive from the readers. The Sneeze solves this by changing the date on posts so he can recycle his content, but that would mess up the chronology of the archives. I see Tony Pierce and others mention past posts of their own, and this refreshes the content somewhat, but we need a simple, automated, and understandable method. Not something we each must rig up.

Secondly, and I have mentioned this before, there should be a simple way to connect similar posts between blogs. Face it- hardly anyone understands trackbacks. We might as well get rid of them unless someone decides to start explaining them and making them easier to use. I’d love to be able to like a post i see on your site to one i did (earlier) on mine. The conversations will continue and weave throughout the blogosphere and keep our content relevant and fresh.

The only automated attempt at a solution that I have managed so far has been developing several categories and linking whatever categories a post belongs to at the bottom of the page.

I don’t think content should expire. I think we cheat ourselves on accident by allowing it to. I bring up the same stuff in conversation a lot. Heidi even has this code for showing me when I’ve told a story 5 or more times. If anyone has a solution for this, incorporate it into a blogging tool and you know you have at least one person who will jump on it. Until then I’ll just keep linking to this, changing it’s date, copying it and pasting it, or if all that fails maybe resorting to comment spamming. That last one was just a funny. Please don’t kill me.

There’s a new clip available in the video secion of the site. It’s my latest standup.

I think I’m really starting to find a groove with my performances. One of the other comics came up to me later that night and told me, “you say a lot of offensive stuff- but you make the audience like you so you get away with it.” I took that as a HUGE compliment because that’s what I go for.

I love it when you can joke about something and make people feel a little guilty they just laughed. That means you’ve taken them somewhere new. They might have found it funny before but didn’t figure they had permission to laugh. That’s my favorite stuff. The forbidden laugh.

Thing is, my stuff has been getting more offensive, but that’s how I think. All of my closest friends know that. It’s just that most of the time I have to work really hard at censoring myself because most people wouldn’t understand an unedited stream of Ed.

From the stage, though, they let you get away with it. They let you give them permission to laugh at all the off-limits stuff.

This set was a little wonky for me since I got nervous. I haven’t felt that nervous in a while. I head over to this place right after a 3 hour class which is after a full workday. I don’t have time to think it through- I just hurry over there, grab a beer and go up on stage.

It was cool though. The audience was generous with the laughs and from what I can tell watching it the fear didn’t show up too much. The worst it does is just keep me from thinking about what to talk about next. I can’t wait until I’ve done it enough that I can just think up bits while on stage.

I’m starting to get my flow a bit, but for some reason I got a bit of stagefright so I took notes up with me. All new material again. Some of it I came up with that day, some on stage.

In an incident that sent shockwaves throughout the entire blogging community, it was discovered this weekend that one of the blogosphere’s most beloved blogoteers, Ed Adkins, doesn’t actually write his posts live.

Nope, he lip syncs. “It was embarrassing,” said one longtime reader, “to see such a respected member of the internet community standing on stage, blogging to some pre-recorded post.”

In a scene reminiscent of Milli Vanilli circa 1990, Ed was on stage with his band, ready to blog about missing lunch on Saturday, when suddenly a post about the presidential debate started to appear on his site. His publicist posted a statement on Sunday that it was apparently due to a “computer glitch,” while Ed was caught on tape blaming his band.

Whatever the case, the entire blogging community is caught in an uproar. Some are calling for tighter legislation on the disclosure of lip syncing, while others say that the networks must be held responsible. “I was surfing the net with my child,” said Martha Stansbury, a mother in Duluth, “when that post was flashed before both of us. And now she’s asking questions I just can’t answer.”

While the FCC looks into who to fine for this incident which many have now dubbed, “lippergate,” an entire generation attempts to pick up the pieces of their shattered dreams and get on with their lives. One thing is clear, the internet will never be the same.

I almost forgot! I got to do a few commercials. Thanks to Mr. Jerz’s wife, I landed three TV commercials for the Reno Tahoe Open and one radio spot. It was actually over the summer but I wanted to wait for my redesign before I posted them. Ihad a ton of fun doing them and it’s pretty surreal to see yourself on the tele. I’m going to try to get some more in the future- the whole thing was so much of a blast.

Check em out in the video section.

I was reminded today of one of the all-time best comic series I ever laid my eyes on. White Trash. If you ever get a chance to wrap your greasy little mitts around it, please do. For yourself. It will change you. Make you better.

It’s pure. white. trash.

But not the concentrated crap of the “Blue Collar Dancing Monkeyboys.” And it’s got less dignity than Paris hilton. It’s rock and roll. It’s mountains of beer, drugs, sex and guns. It matches the violence and carnage of Lobo with the style of Blues Brothers. It’s heavy metal. White Trash stars Axl Rose and Elvis. Well, in a Bubba Ho-Tep sort of way. It’s a shame but I don’t have my copy any longer and I seriously need to find it again.

I didn’t know it but the artist behind it, Martin Emond passed away this past March at a very young age. That kid was a genius. Throw up your goats, kid.

That’s right, gentle readers- the all new swanky Video Section of edadkins.com is now OPEN!

Feel free to browse and laugh at me.

Just remember- be kind and rewind.

You know, the poor don’t have much. Serious. Doesn’t that make you feel bad? They are really, really poor. Well, then- how come we let them get robbed RIGHT IN FRONT OF OUR FACES?

That’s right. And who is robbing them? THE RICH. Yup. That disgusts me.

The rich have cribs. They have cars for each holiday- including minor ones like Arbor Day. They gargle with Crystal and use priceless paintings to towel off after they shower. So WHY do they go and take what little the poor have?

It’s sick. It’s barbaric. I can’t live in a world like this.

Why Britney? Why Christina and for the love of all that’s good and holy, WHY Paris?

Why, when you have all those riches, do you have to go and STEAL WHITE TRASH?

Those are good, hard working, decent folks. It used to be they could count on you celebs to wear stuff they could never hope to afford. Award shows, premiers- everything you went to you celebs would wear the richest looking stuff imaginable. Weird crap too. Anything to look rich.

“Oh this dress? Isn’t it gorgeous? Calvin Klein hand-dipped 12 minks in solid gold and then linked them together using spotted owl feathers. They’re very in this year.”

But now you sport tractor hats and neon tube tops and always look like you woke up in the arms of a trucker named Jimbo and stumbled right out of his cab onto the pages of US. How dare you. Is nothing sacred?

Lay off, sisters. White Trash belongs to the poor. They don’t have much, but let them keep tight capris with high heels and huge hoop earrings. Go back to your lavishly expensive designer styles and leave them some dignity.

This is really getting to me. My site looks totally different on different computers. I’ve been trying to tweak the colors here and there but when I make it look cool at home, it sucks at the office.

You change one color- it effects all the others. You place one functionality in and everything looks crappy.

I was going for form and function. Simple and bold form, easy functionality. The scheme was to be “beetlejuice meets socialist propaganda.” What a got looks more like some underground zine Martha Stewart will be putting out from prison.

Sometimes it looks like a double scoop of crap with crappy little sprinkles on a crap cone. Then I stare at it for a while and it’s beautiful.

Hm. Computers. They make life easy.

Posted Gnomedex Pics in the Gallery.