Gobble Gobble Gobble

I have so much tryptophan in me right now I feel like I’m going to collapse outside the Viper room.

Come now. Don’t we all agree turkeys got screwed royally with the whole tryptophan deal. Other animals get claws, fangs, even the occasional stink spray- but turkeys evolved with a tranquilizer in their blood? Not fair. Plus they taste great.

Some predator is barreling down on a gaggle of turkeys, how sad is it that the best some brave turkey can do is take a step forward, stick his chest out and tell the group to run along- he’ll handle this. The wolf takes him down, starts tearing into him and he’s all, “Oh yeah- jokes on him. He’s gonna be sooooooo tired soon.”

Oh well. I’m grateful for sure. Heidi made this turkey that’s so good you’ll name your firstborn after me for sharing the recipe with you. We hung out with great friends and family, drank some good discount priced wine suggested by this guy, and ate far better than I deserve to. You’ll find the recipe for the turkey in the extended entry. By the by, it requires spruce- which I had to procure after dark behind a couple local businesses. Enjoy.

Spruced-Up Turkey
From the November issue of Wine Spectator
(thanks to Rob for this incredible find)

Brine (see recipe)
1 large fresh turkey (about 18 to 20 pounds)
1 (2-by-2-foot) square of cheesecloth
2 pounds (8 sticks) butter, melted and warm
Spruce branches for garnish (optional)
Note: You’ll have to identify and cut your own spruce branches.

Prepare brine.

Submerge turkey in brine, cover and refrigerate overnight.

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.

Remove turkey from brine and rinse it off under cold water. Place turkey in a roasting pan. Carefully dip cheesecloth into melted butter and then lay it on top of turkey. Place turkey in oven and roast 3 to 4 hours, basting cheesecloth with melted butter about every 30 minutes. Turkey is done when a thermometer inserted into thickest part of thigh registers 160 degrees.

Remove turkey from oven and allow it to rest 30 minutes. Carefully remove cheesecloth and place turkey on a serving platter. Surround turkey with spruce branches, if desired. Makes about 12 to 14 servings.
Brine

11/4 cups kosher salt
3 1/4 cups sugar
2 cups honey
6 sprigs each of parsley, thyme, tarragon and sage
2 sprigs rosemary
1 cup pickling spice
2 cinnamon sticks
1 tablespoon juniper berries
2 lemons, halved
5 star anise
8 sprigs spruce branch (or one 2-foot-long branch, cut into small pieces)
2 gallons boiling water

Combine all ingredients except boiling water in 5-gallon, heat-proof container large enough to hold turkey. Pour boiling water over brine ingredients and let mixture cool to room temperature.

Note: Heidi also made ginger gravy, which complimented it very nicely. You simply whisk crumbled ginger snaps into the drippings, on low heat. Incredible. The turkey would be proud.

By Ed Adkins on November 25th, 2004 at 9:51 pm

Topics: Mem-wires

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